It's Wedding Day!

Day 17 - October 29, 2021

Today is wedding day! 

I stayed up late talking to a friend and taping little bows on gift boxes. That task hurt my back a little bit so I took a nap on the tile floor for a while after breakfast.

The weather is cool and breezy today which is a nice break after the continual heat. 

My hosts gifted me with a new “dress” for the wedding which is one of the long shirts called kurtas. This one is a little more elaborate than my regular ones. The cost of this kurta was about $45 which shook me. If you don't know, I am a thrift-aholic. I had a lot of expensive clothes and shoes...that someone else owned before me. The most I usually spent on an item was $20 unless it was a good pair of brand new shoes, in which case I would splurge because of their longevity. but literally everything else I own comes from Goodwill or Dirt Cheap. I have a blast rummaging through everything and finding hidden $2 treasures. This whole walk-into-the-store-and-grab-something-off-the-rack thing is NEW to me. Kinda cool. I kinda liked it. But I honestly walked in grabbed the first neutral colored item I saw and was ready to walk out. One of my friends in another part of this country earns in a day of work what just grabbed off on the rack and that fact alone made me a little nauseous. But, I am incredibly thankful to my hosts for the gift and for treating me special while I am here. I know what you just read may not sound like it but I am blown away and grateful beyond words. However, for the sake of the culture comparison I decided to share my thoughts on the shopping excursion.

I was told I would be at the wedding from 3-11 PM. However, it is already 4 PM and we have not left yet because this country operates on a different time frame than the US. Apparently it is also prayer time for the Muslims because their call to prayer is echoing through the city right now. 

Let me just say, I love a schedule. I can roll without one but I do enjoy having at least a play by play before something happens. There was next to no communication with me specifically. I learned that my host, under stress, ceases to communicate entirely. Which is a challenge when you are working an event together. I genuinely have no idea what is about to happen. But you know what? I am a professional (I think) so I will shoot, deliver, and be done. I will write my own timeline as I go and I will adjust for next time. No problem! 

Hours Later...

So the first half of this event operated very similar to the US. The last half was very different. The Bride and Groom got ready and then spent time with their family briefly before heading to the banquet hall. I was told that low budget weddings operate during the say and bigger budget wedding happen at night. This wedding was at night, so although it was a bigger budget there was no Golden Hour or any sunlight at all. Which means that I photographed everything during getting ready with one flash because that is all I brought from the US. I can use flash but if you follow Elizabeth Gelineau you know that I do not use it often, but we made it work.

The time for the Bride and Groom in the banquet hall was spent on a white couch for the duration of the event. The family did some singing, gave speeches, presented garlands, told memories, and the whole time the bride and groom just sat on a couch and listened. Everyone else in the audience snacked the whole time on juice, egg rolls, and a spicy tofu. I sampled some of this spicy tofu because a friend asked me to try it. After crossing myself quickly I shoved the whole thing into my mouth, chewed, and swallowed all while my friend about fell out of his chair laughing. It wasn't too bad but tofu has a weird texture to me. I am glad there was water nearby to cut back on the heat of the spicy flavor.

Interestingly, every person they talked about in the speeches they gave their name and job title. Which is interesting because we don’t do that in the US. It doesn’t really matter to us but it matters here. Your job gives you a status and if it’s a good status then you want to talk about it. It was basically like saying, "Your grandad was a banker and we really loved him because he provided well for his family. We hope the same for you." Then the other family tries to top that mentioned family member, "Well his grandad was a construction worker and build the Taj Mahal with a hammer and a bar of soap. We hope you can be as resourceful." This is just a fun example but you get the idea. I don't even speak the same language they do and I caught this back and forth speech giving pretty quickly. During these speeches however, my Akka decided to say a joke about me being "white" that almost made me shout. I literally almost lost everything in me in the middle of the mother of the bride's speech and it was glorious.

When I also tell you that the programs for this event were printed yesterday. I took the engagement portrait on Wednesday, they sent it to the printer Thursday, and everything came back in time for the wedding.

Everyone in the family said thank you to the guests. This family is German and Indian so thankfully a lot of English was being spoken. Oddly enough I understand some of the German so that was cool to realize. Each family that attended walked up on stage and took an unposed portrait with the bride and groom. I posed the bride and groom because I wanted them to look flattering but the other photographer in charge chose not to pose anyone else which seemed odd to me. I am working with the language barrier and I was unable to do anything about it, but after all the families came and went I took some formal family portraits with the bride and her family since they hosted the event.

On another note I have watched every single one of the other photographers and videographers take photos and videos of me. Being an anomaly (Light Skinned) is a weird experience. I can say with confidence that I don’t want to be famous. These photographers also stood right in the center of the aisle between the audience and the couple for the whole event. I stood to the side and hopped in every once in a while to get my shots. After the evening was over one of the bride's uncles came up to me and said he liked my style of shooting because all of the photographers here apparently stand in the center and I chose not too. I told him what I was doing is just normal in my country so I was uncomfortable standing in the center. He thanked me for that.

There were endless options for dinner that were all spicy except for a tray of raw veggies and bread so I had that for dinner. They also had what I am calling knock-off-bread-pudding with ice cream, which they have an actual name for it that I cannot remember. My friend told me there there was some "Karn" I could have as well and due to the fact that I was exhausted and tired it made me laugh so hard to hear him pronounce "corn" that way. I sat with some of my other friends after dinner and we joked for a half hour about everything and nothing. The whole time we whispered because the baby was sleeping but we had fun and my heart is full. Arrival time back at the house was...Midnight.

These are getting harder to write on time as the days get busier. Thanks for continuing to track with me!